Old Sayings

My nose is itching really badly right now. It's almost like a bug is crawlin' around in there. I was stepping out to have a smoke and told Fran that my nose itched. She asked, "You know what that means right?"

"Yeah, someone's thinking about me."

"No, you're gonna kiss a fool."

That started me thinkin' of other old sayings. Whenever I got a shiver, my Mamaw would say a goose had walked over my grave. How does THAT work when I'm still alive?

Anyone else have an old one that made absolutely no sense?